Weekend Quickie #220

Weekend Quickie #220

Saturday, February 26, 2017

One Image, One Prompt, One Emotion

200 Words


Grape jelly

4 thoughts on “Weekend Quickie #220

  1. Decisions, indecisions.

    Currently thinking of buying another car.
    Four grandchildren. When they stay over, we can’t take them out anywhere far.
    So..do I keep my wee three door, 30,000 mile, 2008 model Corsa or buy a seven seater that will probably have more miles on the clock?

    Reasons for Corsa – Strangely easier to strap kids into rear car seats, with front seat tipped forwards. Reason for seven seater – Seating space.

    But then a certain car comes beside me at the traffic lights and I’m back in 2004. Driving the car of my dreams. Coupe cabriolet. Other half, has said he will buy me another if I want one. Which would be great, but with only four seats, where would I put the kids?

    Decisions. Indecisions. Too wet and windy this weekend, for looking around car showrooms. Not the weather for a coupe cab either. Mine, and that of a friend, leaked like a sieve, three years in and out of guarantee. Moss growing along the edge of folding glass roof.

    The toaster pops. I retrieve the bread. Open the cupboard, take out the newly opened jar of grape jelly and spread lavishly on my snack. Car thinking can wait.

  2. Sticky Business

    Andre pulled the car over to the curb, shut off the engine, and sat back in his seat, completely exasperated.
    Bertolli turned in his seat to face Andre. “Cheer up, Dude. This kinda thing takes time. You gotta be persistent.”
    Both hands on the steering wheel, Andre squeezed the purple fuzzy cover anxiously. “It just ain’t happening, Bert! What am I doing wrong?”
    Bert shifted his gaze. “Dude, you done so many things right. You’ve got an awesome product, at a ridiculously low cost, still giving you an awesome markup. Your advertising scheme is brilliant, and you’ve got that macho style the ladies love. You certainly rule the territory; ain’t no competition; none at all! The only thing I see is maybe you oughta put some advertising decals on the car.”

    Andre was silent for a few seconds. “I don’t know, Bert. I was thinking of gettin’ some fuzzy dice to hang that look like the product instead. Ain’t that enough advertising? I done painted the car and snazzed up the wheels to draw attention. I got flare! I don’t wanna be stickin’ posters all over it.” Andre got out of the car, opened the trunk, walked up to the first person that came by and started his sales pitch. “Hey, mister, wanna buy some grape jelly? I’ll give ya a good price. My grandmother made it with her bare hands! Hey, don’t walk away. What’s the matter with you?”

  3. He pulled in behind a Camaro, parked outside his favorite store, slanting his wheels so the hub caps showed off prominently, and strutted into Advanced Auto Parts to pick up a steering wheel cover and matching floor mats, preferably in the color of grape jelly.

    His $189 Rock Revival jeans were crisp and new, his $245 Nikes still white, and his gold chain peeking through the $329 Ralph Lauren hoodie offered just the right touch of bling as he made his way to the end of the aisle.

    A boy got out of the Camaro, brandished a piece, and followed him inside.

    It was over fast. A squeal of tires. Silence.

    He peered out. The swearing clerk. Busted glass.

    Sirens in the distance. Would they think it was him? He bolted for the door and got to the car to find his hand covered in glass, bleeding profusely, messing up his new interior. A trail of blood followed him. He shoved the Crown Victoria in gear and slammed on the gas, just as two police cars swerved in front of him. Officers jumped out, guns aimed at him.

    “My Mama’s going to kill me. How do I always get in trouble like this?”

  4. “Hey, nigga! What you doin’? We ain’t got no time for no autoparts!” slapped Raymond. “We gotta get that damn grape jelly ‘fore the corner shop close and then when that happen your Mamma break your ass!”
    Denis punched the buttons in his lowrider one more time for the hydraulics to jump the car as they cruised past ‘Advance Auto Parts’ at a cool, smooth 5kmph.
    “I don’ know, Raymond, it jus’ don’ feel right. Ma baby ain’t handlin’ like she should, y’awl, you know what I’m saying?” He parked her up in front of the place and caressed the dashboard.
    “Yoh, nigga! You can’t do this! Your Mamma gave you the cheque to go down to the corner shop and buy what she want! She gonna kick your black ass across the city, boy!”
    “I hear ya, I hear ya! There ain’ nuthin’ more my Mamma like than that damn grape jelly but my baby’s sick, Raymond! She need some sweet, luvin’ care!” Denis opened his door and got out.
    “Don’t you do this, Denis! Don’t you dare! I ain’t gonna save your ass from no whippin’ ’cause you deserve it!”
    Denis stood facing the store, split in indecision.

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